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‘Twas the night before (Yankee) Christmas

Peter Abraham
December
24

yankees_christmas_stocking_06_a-747624.JPG(With apologies to Clement Clarke Moore)

‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the blog; not a creature was stirring, readers were agog

The pinstripes were hung by the chimney for real, in hopes that Brian Cashman should soon make a deal.

The fans were nested, all snug in their beds. While visions of Santana danced in their heads.

Suzyn Waldman in her kerchief and John Sterling in his cap, had just settled down after one final nightcap.

When out on the field there arose such a clatter, I sprang from the press box to see what was the matter.

Away to the clubhouse, I flew like a loony. Tore open the door and knocked over Brian Bruney.

The moon on the breast of the new Bronx snow gave a lustre of mid-day to Wang and Cano.

When what did my wondering eyes then see, but a roomful of players under 30.

With a new manager, bright so they say. Who would NoMaas blame for losses in May?

More rapid than Damon, his prospects they came. He whistled and shouted and called them by name.

Now Hughes, now Joba, now Kennedy and Melky. On Tabata, on Horne and you too, Cervelli.

To the top of the short porch, to the top of the wall. Dash away, dash away, dash away Giambi!

Up to the new stadium, the prospects they flew. With a sleigh full of toys and Joe Girardi too.

And then in a twinkling, I heard something screwy. But not to worry, it was only Matsui.

As I picked up my pen and was turning around, down the chimney Shelley Duncan came with a bound.

Farnsworth was dressed all in furs, from deer he had shot. If only his fastball were nearly as hot.

A bundle of jewels, Jeter had were quite shiny. He would give them out later, to models in Miami.

A-Rod’s eyes, how they twinkled! His dimples, how merry. Boras in Cali would see not a penny!

Hank’s droll little mouth was drawn tight with a smoke. He had just called all the writers to tell them a joke.

The control of the team, he liked it just fine. Don’t tell his brother or his father, Big Stein,

Andy’s sad face was a grim sight to see. He had used HGH, but just once don’t you see?

Girardi was there, laptop on a shelf. I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself.

A wink of my eye – or was it a tear? I knew right away Torre wasn’t here

He spoke not a word and went straight to his work He filled out his lineup and called Schilling a jerk.

And laying a finger aside his short hair, he went to the field with nary a care.

He sprang to the dugout, to his team gave a whistle. And away they all flew to another East title.

But I heard his exclaim as he headed away. Pitchers and catchers in 51 more days!

This entry was posted on Monday, December 24th, 2007 at 1:11 am by Peter Abraham.
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103 Responses to “‘Twas the night before (Yankee) Christmas”

  1. Huuz

    classic stuff. nicely done, pete.

  2. Yankee Fan in Chicago

    Bravo.

  3. Sean

    Not too good But good effort.

  4. Peter Abraham

    Sean: Feel free to do one better and post it. I’m just trying to have some fun.

  5. christheyankeesfan

    That was hilarious.

  6. Lamar

    Nomaas is gay

  7. Senor A. Boy

    Peter, that is awesome. I do not know what I would do without you.

  8. Say it ain't so

    Very clever and creative, Pete. Nice job.

  9. Sylvia

    Merry Christmas ,Peter and all of yankees fan.

    ^_^
    Best wish,
    from Taiwan

  10. Faiaz

    you must’ve been booooooored

  11. Ben N.C.

    Pete — Nice work. Funny what a few beers can do.

    But seriously, 51 MORE DAYS? Jeez.

  12. russomcbo78

    lol that was funny….good work pete
    merry xmas to all yankees fans

  13. JJNJ

    LOL good stuff right there, Pete! Merry Christmas :)

  14. Thomas

    good stuff pete.

  15. SteveNYG

    Happy holidays to all LoHud brethren. Gear up for next year and our quest for 27.

  16. mko

    LOL, not bad at all. Try saying it out loud in a hip hop rhythm, that one’s got one-hit-wonder written all over it! :-D

  17. Drive 4-5

    Very good Pete!

    Merry Christmas and happy holidays to Pete and all my fellow bloggers here. The Drive 4 Jeter’s 5 continues in ‘08!

  18. murphydog

    With apologies to Pete Abe.

    ‘Twas the night before Christmas, and all through Ruth’s House
    not a creature was stirring, not even that louse,
    Who had snitched out old Roger and Andy for their,
    use of banned drugs to squeeze out one more year.

    The Trolls of Sam Horn were all snug in their beds,
    while visions of Santana plums danced in their heads.
    And Hanko in ‘kerchief, and Cash in his cap,
    had just finished texting and started to nap.
    When out by the bullpen there arose such a clatter,
    That Cash thought it Wells, only much fatter.
    Away to the window he flew in a flash,
    Not wanting that lefty, and his great big fat “ash.”

    The moon on the breast of A-Rod’s blonde stripper,
    gave Cynthia chills and she wanted to rip her,
    when, what to Rod’s wandering eyes should appear,
    but a crew cut new skipper who inspired great fear.

    With a slap to the head that was lively and quick,
    Rod knew in a moment he’d been such a d…, um, jerk.
    More active than Torre, with statistics ablaze, Girardi he whistled and the lineup they came:

    “Now Damon! Now Jeter!
    Abreu and Rod!
    On, Jason! On, ‘Decki!
    On, Cano and Posad!
    To the top of the ninth!
    When Mo shuts them out!
    Now dash away! Dash away!
    O what a rout!”

    And then, in a twinkling, Cash heard on the roof
    the prancing and pawing of Bill Smith’s cloven hoof.
    As he drew in his head and was turning around,
    down the chimney Old Smith he came with a bound.

    Smith was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,
    and his clothes were all tarnished with dollars and loot.
    A bundle of offers he had flung on his back,
    and to this miser, Cashman threw a great smack.

    Smith’s eyes grew real heavy, his dimples went slack.
    His cheeks were all red and his nose had a crack.
    Hank burst in the room, “Hey! What’s the matter?”
    Cash said, “Oh, nothing. Just caught me a burglar
    Who wanted our silver, and wanted our gold. So I cracked him a good one, to the floor he did fold.”
    Hank took one look at the creep on his belly, and shook when he laughed, like a bowl full of jelly.

    Cash spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
    and filled out the lineup, the bullpen needs work.
    And crossing his fingers, the rotation was set,
    admittedly without that stopper as yet.

    Cash sprang to his bed, of his team he did whistle,
    And his thoughts flew away in the hustle and bustle.
    But I heard him exclaim, ‘ere he snored through the night,

    “This team will contend! And to all a good night!”

  19. yanks61

    Randy I – on yesterday’s thread:

    “and for all you youngsters on the blog who know a lot about stats but not much about playing, it’s ageism to say anyone over 40 who performs athletically well must be on peds. it’s not necessarily true”

    Hoyt Wilhelm, Enos Slaughter, Ted Williams, Minnie Minoso, Satchell Paige), to name but a few pre-peds players.

    Thanks for pointing that out Randy!

  20. Phil

    Great work, Pete! Merry Christmas!

    Next week, it is on! Giants v Pats!

  21. DadinIowa

    Classic! Great poem, Pete.

    Merry Xmas and holiday season to all. May you share safety, happiness and peace with all of your familes.

  22. LathamJoe

    Mahvelous, murphydog!

    Happy Holidays to All!

  23. mike f

    great way to start the day. that was wonderful, thanks

  24. Don Capone

    Love the screwy/Matsui rhyme! Thanks for all of the blogging you’ve done this year, Peter! Have a great new year.

  25. mike f

    also to you as well murphydog!

  26. Thurman

    Yes, 51 more days and counting….! My favorite day of the year, every year — Pitchers and Catchers Report!

  27. Roy Hobbs

    Pete, Great job on the poem and on the blogging all year long. It’s a great time to be a Yankee fan.

    Murphy,

    Great job on the poem.

    I’ve enjoyed the blog and everyone’s comments (even the whiners from April and May). Merry Christmas to all and a Happy and Prosperous (and Troll-Less) New Year too!

  28. Paul

    A total hoot. I got a huge laugh reading it. The very best for the holidays to you and your family, Pete. Paul.

  29. Scott Coulter

    “And then in a twinkling, I heard something screwy. But not to worry, it was only Matsui.”
    This was the line that cracked me up!! Thanks for a good morning laugh, Pete!!

  30. randy l.

    On the twelfth day of Christmas,
    my true love sent to me
    twelve hitters hitting
    eleven pitchers pitching,
    Ten sports writers writing,
    Nine hotties dancing,
    Eight strippers stripping,
    Seven bloggers blogging,
    Six beers a waiting,
    Five world series rings,
    Four lucky squirrels,
    Three young starters,
    Two more first basemen,
    And a santana in a yankee tree!

  31. Jaewon

    YEAH!!!!

    51 DAYS!!

    THESE POEMS ARE AWESOME!

  32. JDnotDrew

    Oh what a christmas treat!! Pete and the rest of you are 2 funny. Thanx for the laughs and the great year we’ve had together. Merry Christmas and happy New year to all.

  33. yanks61

    Randy I – on yesterday’s thread:

    “and for all you youngsters on the blog who know a lot about stats but not much about playing, it’s ageism to say anyone over 40 who performs athletically well must be on peds. it’s not necessarily true”

    Hoyt Wilhelm, Enos Slaughter, Ted Williams, Minnie Minoso, Satchell Paige, to name but a few pre-peds players.

    Thanks for pointing that out Randy!

    Oh, and for goodness sake, let’s not forget Niekro and Ryan!

  34. Jeff NJ

    Peter, Murphydog and Randy, thanks for making a boring baseball day interesting. This blog is still the best, NoMaas makes funny pictures, but otherwise they are a bunch of morons.

    Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all! 2008 is going to be the best year ever, no doubt in my mind!

  35. Born in da Bronx

    thanks for all you do pete! the poem is priceless.

  36. ellen

    Outstanding, Pete! Thanks for everything and have a very happy holiday.

  37. stef

    Ah, I enjoyed the Christmas treat you sent our way, Pete! Thanks for a terrific year of blogging and reporting. You’re the best!!

  38. Lori

    great job Pete- on this and every blog entry all year long. Have a merry Christmas.

  39. Drew

    Good stuff Pete! You removed your pic. Scaring too many kids? ;)

  40. bodhisattva

    Enjoyed this, very cute (didn’t like the HGH reference to Pettitte, however. Let’s wait until there’s a balanced, league-wide unveiling to put his use into perspective, shall we?) Only – it ain’t unanimous about wanting Santana. Only if he’s a free agent. Not willing to give up ANY of my A level prospects, young pitchers, or Melky, whose absence from CF has not been carefully considered, it seems, by ANYONE. Can’t survive 2008 without him, that’s for sure. We have had the worst outfield in the majors for several years. Melky has narrowed the gaps and has allowed his corner mates to be less exposed. And if Action’s ETA is really 2009, I want both Melky and him in OF. Guess I’m greedy…oh, wait…they’re OURS. Guess I want what’s rightfully mine.

  41. Dr. Acula

    Merry XMas, Empire!!

    Merry XMas, New Yawk City!!

    Merry XMas, Joe Girardi!!

    Merry XMas, Baby Bombers!!

    Merry XMas, Yankee vendors and grounds-crew!!

    Merry XMas, Kim Jones!!

    Merry XMas, C-Rod !!

    Merry XMas, Bleacher-babes ♀♀

    Merry XMas, Peter!!

    Merry XMas, fellow fans/bloggers!!

    Remember, every time ARod cracks one, a Devil gets his wings!!

    ► It’s A Wonderful Blog

    ♪
    Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
    And never brought to mind?
    Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
    and auld lang syne!

    ♫

  42. Eli

    OK Pete,
    Great Blog, but you shouldn’t drink while blogging…

    Merry & Happy…

  43. Alejandro

    HAHAHAH VERY NICEEEEEE I LIKEEEEEE… MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YR TO U PETER AND THE YANKEE FANS ALL OVER MUCH LUV TO THE YANKEE UNIVERSE …boston still s*cks

  44. NooJ

    Now i’m in the christmas spirit!

  45. randy l.

    yanks 61-
    … and how about warren spahn who won a total of 62 games at age 40,41,and 42.

    sometimes our generation has to remind the young one that the game has a history to it. clemens really could have done it all on his own. there’s precedent for everything he’s done.

  46. Rebecca--Optimist Prime--Save the Three Musketeers!

    Bravo!

  47. Karma

    Randi l.-

    pitchers in the warren spahn era had more advantages than today’s pitchers: the pitching mound stood 15 inches (10 inches since 1969), more day games, shorter road trips, bigger ball parks (just look at Yankee stadium’s old configurations), and ball juicing didn’t begin until March 18, 1970.

  48. S.o.S.27

    Well im glad to see im not the only one on this blog in christman eve.

    Great job Peter and murphydog! I couldnt have done any better than that.

    Now for the homework assignment.

    5 GREATEST ACTORS OF ALL TIME.
    1.Leonardo Decaprio
    2.Johnny Depp
    3.Tom Hanks
    4.Denzel Washington
    5a.Robert Deniro
    5b.Al Pacino

    Who’s a better actor Pacino or Deniro?
    Slight edge to Deniro.

  49. joltin joe

    sos

    christman? i like that.

  50. joltin joe

    sos

    no jack?

  51. Berkshire Dave

    Great job, Pete.

    My 10 year old son and I enjoyed your poem.

    PS How many glasses of spiked egg nog did it take to write? :-)

  52. S.o.S.27

    Joltin,
    Youd think I just got here(this country)with the misspellings,run on sentences and sentences that sound like Yoda wrote them.

    My bad. Christmas. Final answer.

  53. torrey

    loved the poems by both Pete and Murphydog.

    Congrats, Pete on having a site which out of town fans can come to find out all about the Yankees in one spot.

    Keep up the good work!

  54. randy l.

    karma-
    only two pitchers won more than spahn when he was 42 in 1963. he won 23 games . the other pitchers were named koufax and marichal.

    so at age 42, spahn won more than everyone younger than himself except for two future hall of famers. the point is that there is historical precedent for pitchers over 40 doing extremely well.
    the height of the mound is irrelevant because it was a constant for all the pitchers at that time.

    my simple point is that clemens doing well over 40 doesn’t prove anything about him using peds.

    also : coal in his stocking for mitchell releasing his report right before christmas. that man has a mean streak in him.

  55. S.o.S.27

    joltin-sos

    no jack?

    Hes probably in my top 10-15. I made my decision on actors that were able to take on different types of roles. Alot of actors seem to go the safe route and take the same roles,just a different movie. example. gangster,hard a$$ etc.

    With these guys I chose seemed to be up for the challenge and took unnacustomed roles that showed their true talents.

  56. Mariel

    “And then in a twinkling, I heard something screwy. But not to worry, it was only Matsui.”

    Best Line! Good job, Pete.

  57. joltin joe

    sos
    let’s see…
    Jack has played a so-called lunatic, a hit-man/mob-boss,
    an astronaut, a shrink, too many roles to mention.

  58. Don

    Great poem Pete, a nice Christmas present (I came online not expecting to find anything new!)

  59. joltin joe

    Pacino and dustin hoffman seem to be typecast. Deniro , at least, has gone to a little comedy lately.

  60. Girardi's a Jerk

    Might be the funniest thing you’ve ever done. Keep it up in 2008.

  61. Karma

    Randi l-

    you bring up an important point – the four man rotation. Pitchers won more games in 1963 simply because they started more games. In 1963, 10 pitchers won 20-games. Their has only been one 20-game winner in the past two seasons, combined.

    Was Spahn a great pitcher? Of course!!! But in terms of numbers, you have to adjust his stats before measuring them with a prior era (cy young) or a succeeding era.

  62. Yanksrule57

    Pete,

    Thank you for the poem. Among the many things I am thankful for this year is finding your blog. Peace be with you and your family this holiday season.

  63. Brian (Red Sox Fan)

    Randy 1 ..
    First, and foremost …. Merry Christmas (and happy Holidays) to all Yankee fans. May your new year fulfill all of your wishes (with the exception the AL pennant, of course).
    Second, not to beat the Clemens horse too much (I do have other topics), but I did see Spahn pitch as he entered his 40s, and there are two significant factors which negate the Clemens analogy: (1) Spahn never had the type of “middle age” decline that befell Clemens before his rebirth, and (2) Spahn relied heavily on spotting his fastball and a newly developed screwball to compensate for his declining velocity.

    By the way, you might want to check the before/after photos of Clemens in this week’s Newsweek (page 14). It reconfirms my recollection of the 1986 Clemens as looking more like Jim Palmer than Mike Ditka. “Filling out” as one ages is a dubious explanation in light of those photos.

    But, seriously, Merry Christmas. What would the Sox be w/o the Yankees (and their fans), and vice versa?

  64. Bobby Dee

    joltin joe-

    Are yous talk’n to me?!!

    Are yous talk’n to me?!!

  65. S.o.S.27

    6-15 List in no order

    Pitt
    Gibson
    Smith
    Nickelson
    Damon
    Ford
    Cage
    Crowe
    Cruz
    Bale

  66. GreenBeret7

    I find it interesting to note that writers and fans who for whatever reason they have for disliking Clemens, in particular, Boston fans, fail to see or refuse to mention the striking similarites in the careers of Clemens and Schilling. Both had a bad first season in the bigs and then started producing, got hurt, pitched bad, got healthy and pitched well. Their careers started dipping at the same age, then both produced 20 win seasons and huge strikeout totals at age 34 and 35, got hurt and at age 37 won 20 games again, got hurt and pitched poorly, won big again and got hurt. Were they both “on the juice” or just normal aging power pitchers? People may wish to check their numbers.

    http://www.baseball-reference......ro02.shtml

    http://www.baseball-reference......cu01.shtml

    We’ll even throw in the ultimate power pitcher, Nolan Ryan, who had 5 200 strikeout seasons after age 40, one of which was 300+ strikeouts and also had 2 no-hitters during that time.

    http://www.baseball-reference.com/r/ryanno01.shtml

    Seems to me that Clemens career isn’t a lot different that others not mentioned. Perhaps a lot of you may want to wait becfore lynching Roger Clemens.

  67. King Penguin

    That was great.

  68. GreenBeret7

    SoS27, you might want to check out actors like James Stewart, Henry Fonda, Marlon Brando, Michael Caine, Spencer Tracy, Audrey and Hatherine Hepburn, Sidney Portier, Richard Burton, Humphrey Bogart, Lauren Bacall, Martin Sheen among others before deciding that the grown-up Brat Pack are the greatest actors in history. That’s hardly the definitive list.

  69. GreenBeret7

    **Kathrine Hepburn**

  70. Karma

    Kate Hepburn

    Boy she was great. Too bad “talkies” ruined her career.

  71. S.o.S.27

    GreenBeret,
    Unfortunately,most of those you named were before my time. Iv seen a small sample of Brando(Godfather)and some of Sheen, but not enough to rate them. You missed Connery on your list. Out of all the ones you listed, which ones stand out in your opinion?

    On a side note. I saw a special a little while ago on Brando. They mentioned that he had to an earpeace during his acting,to give him his lines. Dont know how many movies that occurred in. Or if it was a one time thing.

  72. yanquis1972

    hahaha what the hell are you talking about karma. someones dipped into the christmas champagne a little early.

  73. randy l.

    karma-
    spahn won as many or more than all the younger pitchers than himself except for koufax and marichal. my simple point is that older than age 40 pitchers can perform at an elite level. doing so is not a necessarily a sign of ped use. i’m defending clemen’s right to be innocent until proven guilty.

    i was responding to a red sox fan who said anyone as old as clemens who does well over 40 must be on steroids.

    brian(red sox fan)-
    merry christmas to you too.

    clemens was actually pretty good his last year with the red sox, he just didn’t have the won lost record to go with his other stats. his decline really wasn’t apparent that last year with the red sox.
    filling out is a natural progression too. not many people look the same twenty years later. miguel cabrera looks different from the time he goes into a restaurant and the time he comes out.

    creatine is a legal strength builder that adds twenty pounds to an athlete easily. there are lots of explanations for weight gain.

    clemens has lost a lot of velocity. his splitter functions like spahn’s screwball for him as his out pitch.

    all this said , roger either did it or he didn’t. i’m hoping that he accomplished what he did the right way. i say this as much as a baseball fan as yankee fan since i don’t really look at clemens as a yankee in the sense of jeter, posada, rivera, pettitte etc.

    as a baseball fan, i would also be disappointed if it was discovered that ortiz did peds on a regular basis. last summer i didn’t like hearing that ankiel’s amazing performance may have been fueled by peds.

    players have been tested for steroids the past few years? doesn’t clemens record during this time imply he could perform at a high level without steroids? if he did it the past few years why couldn’t he have done it the whole time?

    i don’t see any slam dunk evidence that proves clemens used peds.
    the biggest christmas present to us all would be if bush would do a blanket pardon for everyone in baseball for anything they did concerning peds and move on with testing in place.

  74. GreenBeret7

    SoS27, it’s like my music…depends on what I’m in the mood for. It didn’t even touch on comedians…who never needed to use 4 letter words to get a laugh, or actresses who didn’t need to strip to be sexy. Brando in Mutiny On The Bounty (also Charles Laughton), On The Waterfront, Teahouse Of The August Moon, Sayonara, Paul Newman, watch Exodus or Somebody Up There Likes Me, Henry Fonda or James Stewart in anything. They were incredible. For just laughing, the Marx Brothers or WC Fields, Spencer Tracy in “The Old Man and The Sea” or “Judgement at Nuremberg”. Old classic thriller/horror pictures without blood and severed heads, Karloff, Lon Chaney, Bela Lugosi. I could name 40 more actors and 100 movies in any field. Anymore, all the movies by a certain actor is no different than his/her last one. The ones you named may be your favorites, but, maybe not the greatest ever. I’m just explaining to you that movies just didn’t start with the Brat Pack. Just an opinion.

  75. GreenBeret7

    Randy L, Whitey Ford also had 24 wins in 1963. He was just a kid, though. He was only 34.

  76. GreenBeret7

    Karma, that was either a joke, or, you don’t know what you’re talking about. Katharine Hepburn was a Broadway acteress from ‘28-’32. She made her first movie in 1932, 4 years AFTER silent movies ended.

  77. Karma

    GreenBeret7-

    “actresses who didn’t need to strip to be sexy”

    Huh? whatz wrong with stripping??

    Claudette Colbert showing ankle was HOT!

  78. Ant928

    But Pete…I thought you were Jewish??? ;)

    Happy Holidays everyone and Pete that was AWESOME!!!

  79. UtilityMan

    Great Job Pete!!!

    Awesome picture Dr.Acula!!!!
    I love clicking on your name to see what fun you have for us!

    And to all a Good Night!!!

  80. Dr. Acula

    Merry XMas, Baasston!

    Merry XMas, Green-Sarine-Can!

    Merry XMas, Inferiority Complex!

    Merry XMas, my-Boston-Kin who disowned and disavowed me (ya know you adore me)!

    Merry XMas, Crazy Road-Signs!

    Merry XMas, Corrupt Big-Dig!

    Merry XMas, Whitey Bolger!

    Merry XMas, Zuzu’s Pedals!

    Merry XMas, Boston blogs who banned me (geez, no sense of humor)!

    Merry XMas, Sully, O’Brian!

    â–º Merry XMas, Manny Being Funny !

  81. Tim

    Pete great job, this is the best Yankees blog on the net. Thanks for all that you do! Merry Xmas!

  82. Humphrey Bogus

    Ahhhh yes ! ….. my name came up again. I sure do miss those smokes at a dime a pack.

  83. Global Warming checking in

    “With a new manager, bright so they say. Who would NoMaas blame for losses in May?”

    Excellent Peter!

    Happy Holidays folks.

  84. Dr. Acula

    Hey Humphrey,

    Did Lauren have a pair or what!!

    Talk ’bout a wet whistle ☻-♥-☻

  85. * * THEE BOSTON BUGLE * *

    Glasses up for the Big Dig Tunnel fiasco. May the cost overruns last until 2086 when a baseball flag stands any chance of flying or until John Henry siphons every last penny out of fans for colossal ticket prices to sit in the Green Sardine Can with 1,194 coats of green paint and counting.

  86. randy l.

    greenberet7-
    good old whitey. i did a quick browse of the stats so i may have missed a few. the yankees should always have a good lefty in the rotation.

  87. mel

    Merry Christmas Eve to all!

    Love the Christmas poems! murphydog definitely deserves a prize.

    Best Actors (not necessarily my “fave 5″):

    1. Al Pacino
    2. Robert DeNiro
    3. Tom Hanks
    4. Clint Eastwood
    5. Sean Connery (slightly edging out Denzel Washington)

  88. Yankees Chick

    This is gold, my delightful friend. It makes me a tad sad (look I can rhyme too!) that the mention of dear Giambino was an insulting one. His hideous tattoo (and I am pro tattoo as an owner of a few myself), his love of heavy metal, his utter lack of fear of chatting to the media about whatever he feels like…. he’s fun to watch.

    My fave line: “He spoke not a word and went straight to his work He filled out his lineup and called Schilling a jerk.”

    Too bad you couldn’t find a rhyme for “jackass” for “m-er f-er” or somethin’, though!

  89. Amanda

    Nicely done Pete – I was hoping there would be another poem this year! Have a wonderful Christmas :)

  90. S.o.S.27

    mel,
    So you didnt answer your own question. Deniro or Pacino?
    Good list there. I had 2 of your your 5, I had Denzel in the top 5. I guess we are the only ones that get an A for the assignment.

    Merry Christmas to all and stay safe.

  91. S.o.S.27

    Poll: Will Santana Clause come in January? I think he will.

  92. GreenBeret7

    Didn’t mean to copy my own post. Was meant for Randy.

  93. mel

    SoS,

    Definitely the top 2 actors of our lifetime. Still can’t believe you had them as 5a & 5b. lol.

    Both have done a wide variety of roles and each has had maybe one stinker over 3 decades of work.

    DeNiro gets the nod for range. He’s better at comedy than Pacino.

    Pacino gets the nod for depth, though. He’s more intense in his roles and has a broader range of emotion (Godfather trilogy and Frankie & Johnny). He’s also able to “act” with a look or even silence.

    So, in the shallow world that we live in, the tiebreaker is ‘who’s more charismatic?’ (they’re a little too old to ask who’s sexier)

    I’ll have to go with Al Pacino.

  94. Jake

    Merry Christmas Pedro.

  95. Philoview

    Pete: Thanks for the poem. The blog is a gift that keeps on giving. It’s not just good beat writing, it’s your sense of humor and perspective as well. Merry and Happy and keep up the great work. Pete Abe 7 the Yankees, a great combo.

  96. Mark McCray

    Pete. You are hilarious.

  97. ken777

    very nice pete, i am glad to have found this blog. Pete, you and the others are better then reading many of the driveby reporters. Keep up, standing up and have a great x-mas and even better new one. Thanks, much.

  98. youngtimer

    What a great present Pete! Hilarious! Thank you and happy Yule to you too!

  99. Chris Serico

    99 comments and a Chris ain’t one.

    Well, that is until now.

    Nice job, Pete! Happy holidays to you and Yankee fans (OK, and to non-Yankee fans, too, I guess.)

  100. Jacques

    Pete, you are the BEST!

  101. murphydog

    Here’s a Christmas present for Cash and the front office. 2d year running they have reduced their luxury tax bill. (Hey, at least it’s going in right direction).

    http://www.sportsline.com/mlb/story/10544325

    A very Merry Christmas to all.

  102. Paul

    Randy L — I agree with you on Spahn and would add that Karma’s all wet on ballpark sizes and HR’s. Shibe Park was a bandbox, as was Ebbets Field (Gil Hodges’s and Duke Snyder’s HR’s went way down when the Dodgers left NY), and even the big parks like Forbes, Yankee, and the Polo Grounds had short spots. I don’t think Braves Field in Boston was that big either, nor was Sportsman’s Park in St.L. And let’s not forget Crosley and Wrigley.

    Spahn was, simply put, one of the greatest lefties of all time, and remember he probably lost 20-40 wins because he fought in WWII. Randy Johnson couldn’t carry his j-strap.

    Happy holidays all.

  103. therston

    Great Job, Pete…very creative writing…glad to see you have other writing skills.

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Thoughts and discussion on the 27-time World Champion Yankees.

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About the authors
Chad JenningsChad Jennings joined the The Journal News in October 2009, having spent the better part of seven years covering baseball in Scranton, PA. He is a graduate of the University of Missouri and an award-winning beat reporter and features writer. E-mail me at cjennings@lohud.com
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Sam BordenSam Borden is an award-winning journalist who joined The Journal News and LoHud.com in January 2008. He covered the Yankees for the New York Daily News from 2004-06, and has also worked as a columnist for the Florida Times-Union in Jacksonville. E-mail me at sborden@lohud.com
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