The tale of the hat stretcher
Posted by: Peter Abraham - Posted in Misc on Apr 15, 2008 
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The visiting team clubhouse at Tropicana Field has a contraption I’ve never seen anywhere else: an electric hat stretcher.
This device heats up to 120 degrees. Then you place your cap on this metal dome and spin a hand crank that opens the dome and stretches the material. It looks like some manner of medieval torture device.
Phil Hughes has a fairly big head (sorry, Phil) but refuses to wear a bigger hat. He rips out the lining and constantly stretches his hat out. Ian Kennedy finds this hilarious.
Phil saw the hat stretcher today and decided to try it out. With Kennedy helping, they heated the machine up and started to stretch the hat. I stood by watching, fearful that I would have to write a story about the aftermath.
“Young pitchers injured in hat machine explosion”
Fortunately, the Franchise and IPK survived and the hat fit a little better. All’s well that ends well.
excellent journalism.
I’ve got an ‘official scoring’ question for those who know their stuff. Rockies – Padres game, how many runs are considered Earned Runs to Jimenez, and why? Official rules state to consider the inning assuming each error did not occur. If there’s an error after 1 out (would have been the second out), then a second out is achieved (would have been the third out), is every subsequent baserunner that scores considered unearned?
__________________________________
Greene walked.
Hairston struck out swinging.
Bard walked, Greene to second.
Wolf safe at first on Jimenez´s throwing error, Greene to third, Bard to second.
Giles doubled to right, Greene and Bard scored, Wolf to third.
Iguchi struck out swinging.
Gonzalez intentionally walked.
Kouzmanoff doubled to right, Wolf and Giles scored, Gonzalez to third.
Edmonds doubled to right, Gonzalez and Kouzmanoff scored.
Pete,
Spike Lee filmed footage for “A Day in the Life of Kobe” for ESPN films yesterday. You need to grab Spike at the next Yankee game and a pitch to do “A Day in the Life of the Three Amigos”.
haha…that’s too great!
I wonder why Phil refuses to wear a bigger hat…more fun to play with fire , i guess
I would’ve guessed Phil wears his hat loose, since it’s always tilted. (such a cool kid)
lol the franchise getting hurt because of a hat stretcher thing… exactly the ray’s plan…
that is just priceless, would almost be as good as matt wise with the salad tong or Clint Barnes with that bag of deer meat…
hilarious
LOL
Kids
Agreed. Fantastic journalism, Pete.
Brilliant.
shelley is hitting .500 in 5 games down there. giambi…not so much…
A hat stretcher sounds like on of those things someone makes up to play a prank on a bat boy or rookie.
I thought they removed that contraption from the clubhouse after the “Jason Varitek Extraction Incident” and subsequent cost of clean-up and sanitization.
Aaugh.Typo–”one of those things.”
ya know, I can almost visualize this happening. those guys are crazy!
Haha, that’s priceless. Too bad that isn’t on tape. I’m glad that all parties survived.
Very funny anecdote, excellently observed, and set forth in a nicely laconic style. Those two have the makings of a new comedy duo.
Hey, how was Mo acting with Moeller?
is this “hat stretcher” some sort of left over from the steroids era? sounds like barry bonds could’ve used a few of these…
trying to picture this thing
maybe something like this?
http://www.edithcaldwell.com/s.....etcher.jpg
http://www.espn.go.com/media/p.....er_405.jpg
little bit of advice here for anyone wanting to form fit a spring training cap (100% polyester): wear it in the shower for 10 minutes, press it to your head, and throw it in the oven at 315 degrees until it dries. It’ll shrink quite a bit. Put it on once it cools down, and it should form fit to your head.
Just thought I’d help.
Another note: Hawkins has given up #21. Maybe now people will stop booing him.
he might as well just retire Steph if he did that. I thought he had the guts to keep his number and shut up his critics, I was wrong. So now no one can wear #21 what a bunch of garbage I hope Austin Jackson takes that number in the future or Shelley Duncan this year.
Sad stuff our fanbase cries for a player who does not deserve to have his number retired. No matter what he did for us there are standards in being put in monument park w/ Babe and Whitey and Reggie..sad stuff
LOL
Thank God for blogs. How did we survive all those years without these kind of stories from the clubhouse?
You never know what you’re gonna read when you check Pete’s blog. I love it.
Brandon,
how many of those championships do you think we win without #21 doing what he did? I’m gonna stretch and say 0, who said you had to be a guaranteed HOFer to get into that park, where was that written in stone? In my opinion Paul was the heart of those teams and that should say enough.
you don’t get in monument park for being a heart of the team. Your letting anyone into that park, don’t you understand that’s hollow ground ? the fact Donnie Baseball is in it w/ no championship is still ridiculous to me. Not everyone gets into monument park are you seriously believing 50 yrs. from now we’re going to be like Paul O’neil wow he was a legend .. The O’neil number thing was stupid, the fact people think his number will be retired is assinine, Latroy giving up his number showed me how he doesn’t have the stones to be here.
Good story. The 2 Amigos had a 3 Stooges moment!
It’s posts like this that make this blog so great.
Nice move by LaTroy Hawkins to give up No.21 and wear No.22, So I guess now we can boo him because he’s simply useless like Kyle Farnsworthless.
Hat stretcher?
When I was a kid in high school I worked in a supermarket. My second day there I was assigned to work with one of the old timers who was packing out a number of boxes of canned tomatoes for a sale underway when he ran out of shelf space. He instructed me to go in the stock room and find a shelf extender. I went from employee to employee asking where I could find a shelf extender, not wanting to go back to my “mentor” and inform him I failed. Desperate, I finally marched up to the assistant manager and told him what I was looking for. He asked me what they were teaching kids in school these days and informed me that the shelf extenders were in the stock room near the buckets of steam.
Rookie hazing of a kid by a couple of adult morons who were full time employees in a supermarket. Still funny after all these years, no?
Sorry to hear about Hawkins, but who needs fans breaking your cojones when you are trying to stay calm and throw strikes after some big name, big paycheck pitcher has screwed up the game and left it to you to figure out. IMO, O’Neill should have been more gracious about his old number. I guess the Yankees will need his permission to assign it to the next victim?
Nice to see the Rays are spending their revenue sharing money wisely….
Bob said:
“Bob
April 16th, 2008 at 1:29 am
LOL
Thank God for blogs. How did we survive all those years without these kind of stories from the clubhouse?
You never know what you’re gonna read when you check Pete’s blog. I love it.”
I agree 100%
That small but vocal group of fans has effectively “retired” O’Neill’s number. That is, at least until a player comes along who is either “worthy” of the number (a superstar) or incredibly hard-headed. The whole situation is very scary on a certain level – mob rule.
As for the antics of Phil and Ian – Pete, that’s a gem! I’m just glad the story wasn’t that they got burns on their hands. Very silly boys.
I give a lot of credit to Hawkins for being a great teammate so far (The offer to Patterson,# switch,pranks with Brackman in ST)I wasnt in favor of signing him during the winter,but I hope he puts this all behind him and pitches well.
I was wondering why he didnt request #21 when he signed with the Yanks,thus avoiding a non roster player getting it (Ensberg)Perhaps him starting ST with it as a tribute to Clemente would have avoided such a conflict.
LOL love it. Thanks Pete!
Murphydog,
LOL, it reminded me of some of the dumb things we use to do in the Navy to the “nubs” (new guys). Besides the bucket of steam we would send them looking for “relative bearing grease”.
Hey, it gets boring when you’re at sea for weeks at a time and stuff like this is harmless and helps pass the time.
Makes you think- somewhere there’s a company that makes those machines. “And what does your daddy do, Billy?” “He, uh, stretches hats and stuff.”
LOL re: the killer hat machine.
I feel bad that some people that call themselves ‘Yankees fans’ booed and booed Latroy and BULLIED him into changing numbers.
Any anti-Latroy folks, merely b/c he’s wearing Paulie’s old number, need to lay off.
I think that if Hawkins had been pitching better, they wouldn’t have booed him and would have eventually gotten use to the idea of someone else wearing Paulie’s number. Think about it – if Joba had decided that he wanted to change his number to 21, you think the Yankee fans would have booed him? Not on your life.
My feeling is that since the Yankees are obviously not going to retire the number, any other player has the right to use it. Unfortunately, the fans that were booing disagree with me.
That is too funny, Pete. Thanks for the post….
O’Neill had numerous opportunities to put the whole number thing to rest when he was doing the games on YES and chose not to. I was disappointed that he didn’t tell fans to back off Hawkins, so I guess he’s a happy fellow today.
Barring any rainouts, Yankees @ 19-10 at the end of April
http://mvn.com/mlb-yankees/200.....es-number/
IMHO, this whole thing is pretty silly….
“O’Neill had numerous opportunities to put the whole number thing to rest when he was doing the games on YES and chose not to.”
You are assuming that if he had come out and said stop booing Hawkins that the fans would have listened. I don’t think that they would have.
“O’Neill had numerous opportunities to put the whole number thing to rest when he was doing the games on YES and chose not to. I was disappointed that he didn’t tell fans to back off Hawkins, so I guess he’s a happy fellow today.”
I couldn’t agree more. O’Neill purposely stopped short of supporting a guy who is helping the current team win to soothe his ego. But, since I don’t get it, O’Neill must be acting pursuant to The Secret Ways of Baseball, known only to those who have been to The Show. It sure seems he could have been a bigger guy about this.
Laura -
They booed Hawkins on opening day when he was introduced, before he had even thrown a regular season pitch. They did not even give him a chance to “prove himself worthy of the number.”
Even though I think you are right that the fans will do what the fans will do, I’m sure O’Neill being a little stronger in support of supporting a Yankee player would have gone a long way with at least some of that mob.
If Hawkins really wanted 21 to honor Clemente, why didn’t he ask for it when he signed with the team? What bothers me is that Ensberg gave it up out of respect, and Hawkins immediately grabbed it.
Don’t fool yourself; Ensberg gave it up because he saw the writing on the wall, and he had no particular allegiance to the number.
And if Hawkins wanted 21 “just because” he wanted it, that still should be fine – after all, the Yankees made the number available.
All you people who have a gripe with anyone wearing #21 need to contact the Yankees, not make the player who wears it the victim.
Did Ensberg tell you that personally? Is there a nice view up there on your high horse? My sincerest apologies for disagreeing with the majority here.
“You are assuming that if he had come out and said stop booing Hawkins that the fans would have listened. I don’t think that they would have.”
Ah the Jeter defense. Why not at least try unless the motive was to get the jersey off his back all along.
Tampa must be signing Bonds if they need a hat stretcher….
That’s a shame about Hawkins. Its a bigger shame for Yankees fans
Why act like a bunch of jerks over this non-issue?
Paul O’Neill was a very good player for the Yankees. He doesn’t deserve to have his number retired.
He’s not a career Yankee. He’s not a Hall of Famer. He wasn’t even one of the 10 best players in the league in his heyday.
Yet, some fans decide his number has to be retired and they give a guy (Hawkins) who has been nothing but classy since his arrival in NY, a ton of grief.
In the end, who really “wins” here? O’Neill? He looks like a bigger jerk not coming out and having Hawkins back on this issue.
The fans? Just another embarrassing moment for Yankees fans as they contineu to drift toward acting more and more like Red Sox fans every day.
Hawkins? Now folks will complain that he gave up the number. He can’t win.
BTW, he’s pitched a helluva lot better lately than some of the fan favorites (ie: Bruney) in here.
The punk element of Yankee fans seems to rise more each year. That’s more disappoiting to me than the lack of hitting w/RISP.
This fan base never acted like Raider or Red Sox fan before. Now, more and more adopt this behavior.
Its why I have no issues with the pricing at the new Yankee Stadium. I hope the Yankees price these punks right out of the building. They are embarrassing the team and the fans who don’t act in this manner. Which is about 95% of the Yankees fan base.
You just wish some of these punks would grow up.
Wow Peter T !
That was VERY funny. I never even thought of that– especially with the Devil Dogs being rumored to thought of signing Bonds this preseason…
Funny post!
It’s a welcome sight to see so many Yankee fans giving so much attention to the goings on of minor league levels and the upside of so many good prospects on the horizon.
Brian Cashman’s plan is now showing fruition and gives Damon Oppenheimer incentive to sign more players in the upcoming drafts and to keep a constant flow of talent with sights toward making the big league roster.
Because of the fan interest, these players have become recognized which adds to confidence building.
Pavano can’t rehab his image
April 16, 2008
BY LISA KENNELLY
Check out this article.
“This fan base never acted like Raider or Red Sox fan before. Now, more and more adopt this behavior.”– SJ44
I couldn’t agree more. I live among Saux ‘Nation’ (Maine), and I’ve watched the way people in this area view sports and their teams since I moved here after college eight years ago.
The way they watch a game, expecting the worst, always wondering (and quivering) as to what the Yankees are up to, always rooting for any team that plays against the Yankees.
This is the point I was making (or trying to make after a few brews) on opening day. I don’t care if the Sox win or lose on a nightly basis, as long as they aren’t playing the Yankees. Then, obviously, I want them to lose.
But do I openly root for the Tigers when they play the Saux on a Tuesday in the first week of April? No. Do I hiss and spit if the Sox go on a 7, or maybe 10 game win streak? No. Because I know they’ll lose 4 or 5 in a row come August.
I agree with you on this. Its almost as if, in may cases, there’s been a role reversal. Some Yankees fans view everything with such a chip on their shoulder, or in some cases, such a tragic point of view.
We’re Yankees fans, dammit. We’re supposed to be affluent, alpha, and have a little attitude, a sense of cockiness.
Instead, I read Yankees fans in here and on other message boards that remind me of pre-2004 Saux fans. Full of hate and tragedy.
Some ‘fans’ need to lighten up…
“Carl’s a 1-2 starter,” O’Connell said. “Those guys don’t grow on
trees. Those guys are very rare, 200-inning guys are very rare in
this game, and they’re the ones that make the money. And he did it
two years in a row, before he got hurt, and I’m sure he’s going to
do it again.”
Mindful that his future is at stake as the year winds down, Pavano
said he’s being very careful about his rehabilitation.
“I look at this as laying the foundation for the rest of my career,” he said. “I’m 32 years old, hopefully I can get five or six more years out of it. I’m laying the foundation for the rest of my career so I’ve got to get this right.
“This is not something that I plan on rushing just to get back and prove that I can get back and be healthy. I want to feel good about myself when I get back, not just get back.”
Brandon and all…
If a player’s number cannot be retired in part for sentimental reasons (fan favorite), why is #15 retired? Thurman Munson was not a Hall-of-Famer. He’s not the best catcher in Yankees history.
His number was retired because of his tragic death.
I’m not saying retire Paulie’s 21; rather, I’m pointing out that it could be retired because there are no hard-and-fast rules.
Thurman Munson’s number was retired because he was a team Captain and because of the tragic way he died.
The Yankees have already retired too many numbers and it seems like some Yankee fans are trying to force their hand to retire another one.
Paul O’Neill has lost some stature among some fans for his failure to properly address the number fiasco especially with him having the means of electronic media exposure to make a statement with. He’s done little more than step back from discussion.
Was he a good Yankee as a player ? Yes, and no argument there but not so good as to have a uniform number retired. About equal status to the contributions of what Tino Martinez had.
Paul O’Neill was a favorite of George Steinbrenner but at no time was a number retirement mentioned.
It’s perfectly OK to keep a number in drydock for a year after a playing career is finished but the criteria for retiring numbers permanently should be for career Yankees with special accomplishments.
Tino Martinez played for Seattle before become a Yankee. Paul O’Neill played for Cincinnati before becoming a Yankee. Tino never as much as cringed when #24 was issued again.
It’s time for Paul O’Neill to step up to the plate and eliminate the question on his own. Lingering affects do nothing for the team.
I love hearing stories like these, great job Pete!
OMG, this story is hilarious! Thx, Pete!
Too bad the 3rd Amigo couldn’t partake in this little adventure….Joba & Harlan, we’re thinking of you.
New rule: we have to stop calling him “franchise” until he gets his ERA under 9.
When they call Wang an “Ace”, we’ll stop calling Phil “Franchise”. Which will come first?
Maybe the extra circulation to his brain will allow him to pitch better now.
wow this article was about the hat stretcher…now how did we go from talking about that to talking about Hawkins, O’Neill, Martinez, Cashman, etc?
tell Phil Franchise that there’s nothing to be ashamed about. Big heads rock! I wear 7 5/8, Hideki Matsui dons an 8!