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A New York Yankees blog by Chad Jennings and the staff of The Journal News


The Bachelorette: Cynthia Rodriguez

Posted by: Peter Abraham - Posted in Misc on Jul 07, 2008 Print This Post Print This Post | Email This Post Email This Post

crod.jpgCynthia Rodriguez filed for divorce today from Alex Rodriguez.

Only 34, C-Rod is a good-looking woman who will soon have millions and a few mansions. Lenny Kravitz claims they are just friends, so Cynthia is back on the market.

Who will she end up with next? Here are some possibilities:

Derek Jeter: It makes perfect sense. Jeter always has what A-Rod wants. What better way to drive him even crazier than to marry his ex-wife and make her happy? Plus he has his own cologne, so he smells good all the time.

Jose Canseco: Jose needs a sugar-mama given all his financial woes. Plus he believes that A-Rod once went after his wife. Hooking up with C-Rod would be perfect revenge.

Brett Gardner: He needs a place to stay in the city. Plus he delivers in the clutch. That’ll be a nice change for her.

Hank Steinbrenner: This is all part of the Yankees Master Plan. If Hank marries C-Rod, he gets control of half of A-Rod’s money. Suddenly A-Rod is playing for the Yankees for only $16 million a year instead of $32 million. Brilliant! But Cynthia may not let him smoke around the kids.

Scott Boras: The super agent is already married. But he must have an opt-out clause. If Cynthia wants to get back at A-Rod, what better way than to date somebody he is already mad at?

Alex Cora: Why in the world would Cynthia want to marry Boston’s backup shortstop? For her daughters. A-Rod actually gave his girls the middle name of “Alexander.” At least if she marries Cora, they won’t grow up too confused.

Howie Clark: Ha!

Barry Bonds: Great home run hitter, misunderstood by the media, worth millions. It’ll be just like she is used to.

Jason Varitek: The undeserving All-Star catcher from Boston is high on the Enemies of A-Rod list. But will he take his mask off?

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292 Responses to “The Bachelorette: Cynthia Rodriguez”

  1. Brandon (Jeter GIDP: 12) (Johan Santana HR count: 13 and a SP) July 7th, 2008 at 11:22 am

    I literally can’t stop laughing here :lol:

  2. GGTM July 7th, 2008 at 11:23 am

    Well they have a pre-nup … as posted in the Miami Herald yesterday … so no one is getting half of anything.

  3. j July 7th, 2008 at 11:24 am

    pete its posts like these that keep me reading this blog

  4. Yewnork July 7th, 2008 at 11:24 am

    Am I the only one who thinks she is really unattractive and kinda manish?

  5. Will to the M July 7th, 2008 at 11:28 am

    Great stuff Pete.

  6. whozat July 7th, 2008 at 11:30 am

    “Howie Clark: Ha!”

    Gold, Jerry!

  7. MJR July 7th, 2008 at 11:31 am

    “Brett Gardner: He needs a place to stay in the city. Plus he delivers in the clutch. That’ll be a nice change for her.”

    OUCCCHHH!!!!!

  8. Observer283 July 7th, 2008 at 11:32 am

    Pete, the Gardner crack was a bit unfair. I know you’re kidding, but I think A-Rod’s many walk-off homers (anyone remember last season, anyone?) is better evidence of “clutchitude” than one seeing-eye dribbler up the middle.

    BTW, anyone else doubt that if Gardner turns into a half-way decent major leaguer he will turn into the second coming of David Eckstein?

    Pete has provided us with evidence of this already. This morning he wrote something like “He may have gone 2-31, but it sure has been an interesting 2-31.” The primary modifier to describe 2-31 is “sucks,” not “interesting.” (NOTE: I’m not saying Gardner does/will suck, I’m just saying that 2-31 “sucks”).

    All that said, I found the rest of the bit hilarious. Thanks so much for all your hardwork, Pete.

  9. jay destro July 7th, 2008 at 11:32 am

    i dunno, i dont find it all that funny considering there are two little girls involved. whatever gets hits i suppose.

  10. DMan July 7th, 2008 at 11:34 am

    Haha the Hank Steinbrenner one is the greatest.

  11. whozat July 7th, 2008 at 11:34 am

    Thaaaat post probably got stuck in the filter.

    Wasn’t Cynthia’s famous shirt actually just a French Connection UK shirt?

  12. bunster July 7th, 2008 at 11:34 am

    No Yewnork, you’re not the only one with that opinion

  13. Brandon (Jeter GIDP: 12) (Johan Santana HR count: 13 and a SP) July 7th, 2008 at 11:35 am

    Cheer Up Cynthia :)

  14. jennifer July 7th, 2008 at 11:35 am

    Pete is it my understanding that it is part of the Greek culture that the kids take the parents names as their middle name.

    and the Brett Gardner comment. double ouch!

  15. pat July 7th, 2008 at 11:35 am

    What you waiting for Pete.

    There are flights leaving NYC for FL hourly.

  16. Observer283 July 7th, 2008 at 11:36 am

    I meant to write 3-21, not 2-31 in my above post. My opinion that Gardner’s hitting has sucked so far still stands.

  17. just tellin' ya July 7th, 2008 at 11:36 am

    Manny Ramirez is on shaky ground with his wife. Cynthia will snag Manny and figure she’s bound to get it right with somebody from Washington Heights if she tries hard enough.

  18. whozat July 7th, 2008 at 11:36 am

    “BTW, anyone else doubt that if Gardner turns into a half-way decent major leaguer he will turn into the second coming of David Eckstein?”

    Only if the Yankees win a World Series with him as a starter in the fairly near future. If he’s the leadoff hitter on a championship team, he could easily wind up getting an inflated rep — even if he’s got an OBP of .340 with little to no power.

  19. E July 7th, 2008 at 11:36 am

    “Pete has provided us with evidence of this already. This morning he wrote something like “He may have gone 2-31, but it sure has been an interesting 2-31.” The primary modifier to describe 2-31 is “sucks,” not “interesting.” (NOTE: I’m not saying Gardner does/will suck, I’m just saying that 2-31 “sucks”).”

    3-21 actually. Still bad, but not nearly as bad as 2-31.

  20. E July 7th, 2008 at 11:37 am

    observer – sorry, already beat me to it.

  21. jennifer July 7th, 2008 at 11:38 am

    I do have to say that I think it is a little unfair that Alex’s life is on the front page of the tabloids. Ian O’Conner is killing him for always making the news. Um I didn’t see him running around in public with Madonna. He also hasn’t said peep about anything.

  22. wood is good July 7th, 2008 at 11:38 am

    I’m not saying I don’t feel sorry for the kids, but as they’re children of a multimillionaire, I think they’ll get out of this alright.

    Great post, Pete! I wouldn’t be surprised if this divorce actually perks up his bat. ;)

  23. TL July 7th, 2008 at 11:38 am

    She is kind of a high-end Butter Face. A-Rod told her See U Next Tuesday:)

  24. E July 7th, 2008 at 11:39 am

    observer – sorry, beat me to it.

  25. Brandon (Jeter GIDP: 12) (Johan Santana HR count: 13 and a SP) July 7th, 2008 at 11:41 am

    The Divorce papers are released

    Damn the NYPOST is all over this like white on rice. :?

  26. Scott July 7th, 2008 at 11:41 am

    What a crap post. Pot shots at an easy target. This is not why I read this blog.

  27. raymagnetic ®™ July 7th, 2008 at 11:42 am

    She should marry Andy Pettitte, that’ll stick it to A-Rod since he wants his daughters to marry him.

  28. hmmm July 7th, 2008 at 11:45 am

    “Pete is it my understanding that it is part of the Greek culture that the kids take the parents names as their middle name.”

    no, it has to be because A-Rod is an egomaniac.

    Pete said so.

    even though you pointed this out to him the last time he made this crack right after the baby was born.

    who needs “facts”?

    and yes, i realize this piece was meant to be “funny”.

  29. jennifer July 7th, 2008 at 11:48 am

    I”m sorry but this is getting a little sick. Releasing her divorse papers. I know they have legal right to get them. But lay off it. Lets go dig into all these reporters backgrounds and see if they cheated on their spouces.

  30. dont retire 21 July 7th, 2008 at 11:49 am

    I think this is a cheap shot. considering the amount of time you spend in the locker room with these guys i have to assume you have some kind of friendly relationship with the players, even a-rod. commenting on his personal life like this is unfair. would you do it to his face. i doubt it. and tonight or tomorrow youll probly be kissing his butt looking for a quote. how would you feel if a-rod was conducting an interview and took cheap shots at you and your personal life for the public to hear. no bueno pete. funny but not too classy. just my opinion

  31. Brandon (Jeter GIDP: 12) (Johan Santana HR count: 13 and a SP) July 7th, 2008 at 11:50 am

    jennifer tune in a few minutes when we get reaction pictures and signatures of the spouses.

  32. TL July 7th, 2008 at 11:52 am

    Hey Jennifer,

    What is a spouce? Whatever it is, Peter doesn’t have one.

  33. RhapsodyInBlue July 7th, 2008 at 11:53 am

    I am bored by any of this news. I really don’t need the intimate details. It is a sad family tragedy particularly for the young children.

    Would prefer some baseball discussion here.

  34. DMan July 7th, 2008 at 11:53 am

    “celebs” are easy targets.

    I don’t blame the reporters, I blame the public at large for salivating over the private lifes of other people.

  35. Jean Veljean July 7th, 2008 at 11:54 am

    Painfully unfunny.

  36. Jerkface July 7th, 2008 at 11:55 am

    Stick to reporting the news. Def comedy jam this ain’t.

  37. Global Warming July 7th, 2008 at 11:55 am

    “I am bored by any of this news. I really don’t need the intimate details. It is a sad family tragedy particularly for the young children.

    Would prefer some baseball discussion here.”

    Agreed. Leave this garbage for the tabloids.

  38. jennifer July 7th, 2008 at 11:55 am

    tl- You know what I meant. I wrote it quickly. SPOUSE!!! There you go!

  39. matt July 7th, 2008 at 11:56 am

    Pete, you rock.

    Any mention of “Howie Clark” brings a smile to my face. HA!

  40. Confucius July 7th, 2008 at 11:57 am

    “Scott Boras: The super agent is already married. But he must have an opt-out clause.”

    Great stuff! :D

  41. RonH July 7th, 2008 at 11:57 am

    Not to make light of a sad situation, especially with children involved, but the Hank Steinbrenner angle is brilliant Pete!

  42. Brent (Never Should Have Traded Away Damaso Marte For Enrique Wilson!) July 7th, 2008 at 11:58 am

    TL,

    Congrats for blowing up over Jennifer’s grammatical error. Thank God you pointed that out.

  43. Bob July 7th, 2008 at 11:59 am

    You have children? Are you married? Didn’t think so. Your blog is now officially off my bookmark.

  44. Blargh July 7th, 2008 at 12:00 pm

    That Master Plan…so devious

  45. 2708 July 7th, 2008 at 12:01 pm

    Oh No… We’ve lost Bob.

  46. randy l July 7th, 2008 at 12:02 pm

    hmmm-
    where have you been? the level of subtle insults from the newbies hasn’t been up to your standards.

  47. Annie Savoy July 7th, 2008 at 12:02 pm

    Does anyone else find it very odd that Alex has continued to play for the Yankees during the past week when his family was falling apart?

    What a very odd person he is.

  48. K-ace July 7th, 2008 at 12:03 pm

    LOL @ the Hank Steinbrenner angle, that would be awesome.

    Still as a fan, A-rod is on the team and I feel bad as I want whats best for the “TEAM” and that doesn’t involve baby mama drama.

    @ Pete
    Your brilliant, love the sense of humor :)

  49. S.A.- Just win games and can the offense stop being so offensive? July 7th, 2008 at 12:03 pm

    LOL Pete..
    What about Hal-No?

  50. raymagnetic ®™ July 7th, 2008 at 12:03 pm

    Alex’s daughters are what 6 years and 6 months of age? I seriously doubt they’re logging onto the lohud blog getting offended by Pete’s comments.

  51. gayle July 7th, 2008 at 12:06 pm

    Hank no way now Hal that would be something.

    BUT back to baseball I think we all need to give props to Krazy Kyle over the past bunch opf appearances he has been great in big situations and held strong.

  52. Peter Rabbit July 7th, 2008 at 12:06 pm

    Gardner’s 31 AB’s have been solid, no matter how many hits he’s gotten. He’s been close in each at bat.

    This current lineup has been tainted and the virus has spread to every hitter. Gardner brings a fresh approach.

  53. S.A.- Just win games and can the offense stop being so offensive? July 7th, 2008 at 12:08 pm

    I think we all need to give props to Krazy Kyle over the past bunch opf appearances he has been great in big situations and held strong.

    Definitely. He has been getting it done.
    Does he still scare the Jebus out of me? Yes.
    But he has been doing well…for now….

  54. Tim July 7th, 2008 at 12:09 pm

    I am sorry for the trouble he created for his family, especially his children. However this will be great for team chemistry. Now Arod and Jeter can finally hit the clubs together. Maybe they can meet up with Melky and Cano and teach them how to hit over drinks.

  55. Brent (Never Should Have Traded Away Damaso Marte For Enrique Wilson!) July 7th, 2008 at 12:10 pm

    It’s easy to take (cheap) shots at A-Rod, given his constant media encounters, but I think that most here are right in realizing that the true effect that this divorce has is on A-Rod’s two children. I’m not claiming they’re going to be forced into poverty or anything, because we all know that they will be well-taken care of, but the divorce isn’t really an “ok” subject to joke about as much as it has been. It looks like Cynthia has chosen to take the high road in the matter by not looking for exuberant payoffs or anything else, so wouldn’t it be the right thing to do and follow suit?

    I’m not completely appalled by Pete’s comments, but I do kind of think the blog could do without them. This doesn’t just go for Pete, either. Back when Schilling criticized Barry Bonds and claimed that he cheated on his wife, took steroids, etc. (both of which might/probably be true), I thought it was kind of a low-blow. Who cares what Schilling thinks about Bonds’ marital woes? The same thing applies here. Just switch out “Schilling” with “Peter” and “Bonds’” with “A-Rod’s”.

  56. Brandon (Jeter GIDP: 12) (Johan Santana HR count: 13 and a SP) July 7th, 2008 at 12:11 pm

    You have children? Are you married? Didn’t think so. Your blog is now officially off my bookmark.

    If that’s all it takes then be gone. To compare this situation to middle America is ridiculous, you do know once upon a time a poor boy named Alexander last name Rodriguez grew w/o a father, that’s not what’s happening here, the marriage isn’t working, it’s not him abandoning the kids, will the kid’s grow up poor ? No. Unfortunately it sucks for them that mommy and daddy weren’t a match for w/e reason but it happens, it’s reality. Ella and Natasha aren’t exactly going to be brought up section 8 and welfare wise. Again it sucks but this doesn’t really change anything he’s a MLB player it’s not like he gets to see his kids everyday he can’t, it’s just what happens.

  57. Brent (Never Should Have Traded Away Damaso Marte For Enrique Wilson!) July 7th, 2008 at 12:13 pm

    “Alex’s daughters are what 6 years and 6 months of age? I seriously doubt they’re logging onto the lohud blog getting offended by Pete’s comments.”

    Irrelevant. Of course they aren’t reading the blogs/tabloids. They are still going to have to deal with the divorce though.

  58. Yankeehottie July 7th, 2008 at 12:13 pm

    I almost fell off my chair, effin hysterical Peter!

  59. TGFizeek July 7th, 2008 at 12:14 pm

    This is hilarious!!!!!!!!

  60. Andrew [in] Orlando July 7th, 2008 at 12:14 pm

    funny. but this really shouldn’t even be a story.

  61. Brandon (Jeter GIDP: 12) (Johan Santana HR count: 13 and a SP) July 7th, 2008 at 12:14 pm

    It looks like Cynthia has chosen to take the high road in the matter by not looking for exuberant payoffs or anything else, so wouldn’t it be the right thing to do and follow suit?

    For someone looking to take a mature high road it’s her side that is doing all the talking, her lawyer saids they don’t want this to get in the tabloids meanwhile there he is talking to the media granting pictures of divorce papers and slandering Alex on ESPN..Again high road IMO is not the road Cynthia has chosen.

  62. Yankeehottie July 7th, 2008 at 12:15 pm

    “wow, this was brutal. your “humor” columns are almost as poor as your baseball analysis. stick to reporting, pete. i’d expect to see this article published in a boston newspaper. if you keep this up, maybe one day you’ll get a chance to cover your beloved sox.”

    Hi Hater Hi Hater….

  63. Brandon (Jeter GIDP: 12) (Johan Santana HR count: 13 and a SP) July 7th, 2008 at 12:15 pm

    Irrelevant. Of course they aren’t reading the blogs/tabloids. They are still going to have to deal with the divorce though.

    He’s a baseball player they see him what once a week ? What changes here for Ella and Natasha ?

  64. Clay Buchholz stole my laptop (aka Joe) July 7th, 2008 at 12:15 pm

    Don’t some of the players read this blog sometimes? If this was my blog, I’d be worried that ARod might read my comments.

  65. Brent (Never Should Have Traded Away Damaso Marte For Enrique Wilson!) July 7th, 2008 at 12:17 pm

    “I think we all need to give props to Krazy Kyle over the past bunch opf appearances he has been great in big situations and held strong.”

    I agree. I was at Saturday’s game and if you had told me earlier in the day that late in the game the bases were to be loaded by 2 hits and 2 HBP’s and the game would be teetering on the edge of a loss, I would’ve bet all my money on it being the work of Farnsworth; not Mariano. Instead, he has really been dealing his last few appearances. Hopefully he can keep it up.

  66. jennifer July 7th, 2008 at 12:17 pm

    Brandon, I’m pretty sure the Post being the tabloid that they are were sitting at the court house waiting for the paperwork to be filed. And once it was filed asked for a copy of it.

  67. nick July 7th, 2008 at 12:19 pm

    Posts like this suck.

  68. al arodien July 7th, 2008 at 12:20 pm

    pete youleft out your self! go get her boy!!!!!!!!

  69. Brent (Never Should Have Traded Away Damaso Marte For Enrique Wilson!) July 7th, 2008 at 12:20 pm

    He’s a baseball player they see him what once a week ? What changes here for Ella and Natasha ?”

    With Cynthia vying to get primary custody of the kids, I would guess that they’ll be seeing him a lot less than once a week. Relationships are strained through divorces. Baseball players aren’t immune to that. Also, there’s a difference in not being able to see your father because of work and not being able to see him because your mom doesn’t want him to be around.

  70. Zach in Port Jeff July 7th, 2008 at 12:21 pm

    i think its funny how Boston.com has this as one of their lead stories.

  71. mel July 7th, 2008 at 12:21 pm

    Pete, so low. But so wickedly delicious.

    Day off right? Fly to Mexico, get a quickie divorce. Ready to play ball on Tuesday.

    Move on folks. Nothing to see here, keep moving.

  72. Hugo July 7th, 2008 at 12:21 pm

    Swing and a miss…

  73. Brandon (Jeter GIDP: 12) (Johan Santana HR count: 13 and a SP) July 7th, 2008 at 12:22 pm

    Brandon, I’m pretty sure the Post being the tabloid that they are were sitting at the court house waiting for the paperwork to be filed. And once it was filed asked for a copy of it.

    Jennifer com’on you truely believe that

  74. Brandon (Jeter GIDP: 12) (Johan Santana HR count: 13 and a SP) July 7th, 2008 at 12:24 pm

    Baseball players aren’t immune to that. Also, there’s a difference in not being able to see your father because of work and not being able to see him because your mom doesn’t want him to be around.

    Well then that’s on Cynthia. And I doubt Alex is walking away from his kids, walking away from her might be another story.

  75. SJ44 July 7th, 2008 at 12:24 pm

    1. Don’t get consumed with the colorful language (“Abandonment”, etc) in divorce petitions. The language is always over the top in them.

    2. Boras didn’t draft the pre-nup. That’s not his job.

    3. She didn’t hire 4 lawyers if the pre-nup is cut and dried.

    4. The reality is, once you have kids, unless you amend the pre-nup, its not worth the paper its printed on.

    5. While titilating for the tabloids, I see no joy taken when a marriage falls apart and there are 2 small children involved.

    Why don’t we stick to baseball here. Its the only thing relevent we should be discussing.

  76. raymagnetic ®™ July 7th, 2008 at 12:26 pm

    “Irrelevant. Of course they aren’t reading the blogs/tabloids.”

    No it isn’t. People are offended by Pete’s comments because there are children involved. The children have absolutely no idea about the garbage being printed about their parents. They’re really too young to have an idea. Now do you understand?

  77. Rob (the original) July 7th, 2008 at 12:26 pm

    Bob said:
    July 7th, 2008 at 11:59 am
    “You have children? Are you married? Didn’t think so. Your blog is now officially off my bookmark.”

    Thank God, I was tired of someone else pretending to be the orginal Rob here! :-)

    Very funny post Pete. I don’t find it in bad taste at all.

  78. mel July 7th, 2008 at 12:26 pm

    With the amount of child support that those girls will be getting, no mother or court of law will keep Alex from seeing his them when he wants.

  79. Zach in Port Jeff July 7th, 2008 at 12:26 pm

    Kevin Youkillis is quickly becoming enemy #1.

    Someone needs to give him some cheese…to go with all the whiiiiiiiine.

    WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

  80. Clay Buchholz stole my laptop (aka Joe) July 7th, 2008 at 12:27 pm

    Back in the 70′s Charlie Finley used to pay his players to grow mustaches.

    I wonder if Sox ownership is just doing the same thing. Bonuses for looking like a dirtbag or a lumberjack.

  81. Khoa July 7th, 2008 at 12:27 pm

    Great post Pete. “Gold Jerry! Gold!”

  82. Pete V July 7th, 2008 at 12:28 pm

    There was a lot of talk on here about what it would have taken to get CC Sabathia. So the Brewers gave up LaPorta and some lower level prospects for him. How does that translate to a package the Yanks may have put together? Surely not a package starting with Cano that a lot of folks on here were suggesting…

  83. Chet July 7th, 2008 at 12:28 pm

    Peter-
    Sorta funny post but you should be carefuly what you post on the internet these days. It is one thing to discuss ball players and what they do on the field but even I thought this was a little far reaching. Especially when you have to consider your access to ball players on a daily basis. This will get back to Alex and he may kust shrug it off but he will always know you wrote this. Also I am sure others on the team will know what was written about a teammates soon to be ex-wife, even in jest.

    Anyway I love this Blog and you should be more careful.
    Chet

  84. KLev July 7th, 2008 at 12:29 pm

    Lighten up everyone — Pete did. It was funny. My only question for Pete is, why didn’t he include himself on the list? He’s a great uncle (good with kids), he’s clever, funny, and by getting into journalism, has shown he’s not all about the money….so Cynthia can trust him not to be marrying her for the walking around cash.

  85. Marc July 7th, 2008 at 12:31 pm

    Pete,

    I’m a big fan of you and your blog and I’m really appreciative of everything you do for the fans but I have to say I’m already kind of sick of the way the sportsmedia is covering this like they’re the gossip columns. Leave this crap for page 6…as long as A-Rod is hitting balls over the wall and making plays in the field I don’t care whats happening in his personal life. Once it starts effecting his game then you can write about it.

    Marc

  86. Jeremy July 7th, 2008 at 12:31 pm

    The PeteAbe humor post drinking game:

    Comment calling post hilarious or claiming that commenter is laughing, and containing no other content: 1 drink
    Comment calling post not funny and containing no other content: 1 drink
    Pete commenting that people in group 2 should lighten up: drain flask

  87. Old Goat July 7th, 2008 at 12:33 pm

    Pre-nuptual agreements can include any future children with set amounts decided upon a per child basis. In the papers filed they are “looking at” the contract, that usually means they are looking for any ways around it.

    Life will go on. Baseball will survive.

  88. jennifer July 7th, 2008 at 12:34 pm

    People are sick!!
    http://www.newsday.com/sports/.....9775.story

  89. jennifer July 7th, 2008 at 12:34 pm

    People are sick!!
    http://www.newsday.com/sports/.....9775.story

  90. jennifer July 7th, 2008 at 12:36 pm

    Marc agreed!

  91. mel July 7th, 2008 at 12:37 pm

    This post is really just an extension of the circus that Alex is. Think about it. Would Pete do this to Andy or Mo? No. Damon? Maybe. Posada? Nah.

    It’s also something that Cynthia opened the door to herself. She wasn’t the traditional Yankee wife. While she doesn’t have a “tramp stamp” (tattoo on the base of spine) she opened up the door with that t-shirt. She drew attention to herself, and obviously doesn’t mind it.

  92. KLev July 7th, 2008 at 12:38 pm

    Stace — not nice (no need to take personal shots)…but you remind me of an old Abbott and Costello gig. Lou says he’d “rather marry an ugly girl than a pretty one.” Bud asks “why”? Lou responds: “cuz a pretty girl is apt to leave you for another man…” Bud retorts: “but an ugly girl can leave too.” And Lou responds: “yeah, but who cares”?

  93. Dennis July 7th, 2008 at 12:38 pm

    What about Youkillis everyone hates him, plus he has that homeless man looking goatee how can you resist. Maybe Crod can buy him some Rogaine.

  94. CM July 7th, 2008 at 12:38 pm

    Pete, you wanna tell me WTF this has to do with baseball? I didn’t realize you started writing for the Post. You’re better than this cheap crap, man. Is it really news anymore when a famous ballplayer, or any celebrity for that matter, cheats on their spouse? Besides, picking on A-Rod has to get old at some point.

    But,hey, if you hurry, you might be able to get a few last whacks in at Eight Belles.*

    *making an allusion to the phrase “beating a dead horse” before some of you start getting on me for condoning animal abuse.

  95. S.A.- Just win games and can the offense stop being so offensive? July 7th, 2008 at 12:41 pm

    Can ya imagine how excited Mad Dog Russo was yesterday with that tennis match. I think it rivaled his wedding day in terms of happiness
    I’m expecting 4 hours of tennis discussion from him..breaking it all down..
    :P

  96. CM July 7th, 2008 at 12:42 pm

    “Can ya imagine how excited Mad Dog Russo was yesterday with that tennis match. I think it rivaled his wedding day in terms of happiness
    I’m expecting 4 hours of tennis discussion from him..breaking it all down..”

    Holy crap. And, I’m stuck working at home all day with nothing on TV.

    Time to whip out the LOTR trilogy again (which commentary track havn’t I listened to yet?).

  97. Fran July 7th, 2008 at 12:42 pm

    There are two sides to every story and people are basing opinions on what Cynthia has alleged. We don’t know what Alex has to say about her because he has kept quiet throught all of this. Maybe she made his life miserable.

    As long as he shows up to the games and gives 100%, I don’t care about his personal life.

  98. Joe from Long Island July 7th, 2008 at 12:43 pm

    Pete – great post. Another of the many reasons why I keep coming back here.

  99. Andrew Vazzano July 7th, 2008 at 12:44 pm

    Pure. Genius.

    Well done, Pete. I’m laughing my tuckus off.

  100. They shoot horses don't they? July 7th, 2008 at 12:44 pm

    SJ44

    You have suggested a couple of times on here that the “culture” of the team has to be changed but you haven’t offered any definition of who sets the tone of the culture.

    My take is that 400K players don’t set the culture. But I do believe that two players on this team do. Arod and Jeter.

    I would be interested to hear your definition of what you mean by culture and who represents the culture that needs to be changed.

  101. pcgpm July 7th, 2008 at 12:45 pm

    Oh, and by the way, Gardner is spoken for. His wife’s family might have as much money as A-rod. Her grandfather started Bellsouth. A huge telephone company here in the south.

  102. Zach in Port Jeff July 7th, 2008 at 12:46 pm

    instead of directing hate towards Pete, lets direct it toward that man-child Kevin Youkillis. Granted he has freakish hitting capabilities, but he has a serious attitude problem. I love how we continue to throw at him. The more he whines, the more it continues. Last nights little charade just cost him another fastball in the back!

  103. Peter Abraham July 7th, 2008 at 12:47 pm

    A few points:

    This is not my “coverage” of the situation. I tried to be funny. Some people think it is, others do not. That’s fine.

    I realize that the Alex Apologist Army is a large one. But if you don’t find it just a little comical that he is busting up with his wife because he was chasing around after 50-year-old Madonna than I really can’t help you.

  104. dont retire 21 July 7th, 2008 at 12:50 pm

    just a question pete…

    would you bring this up with arod in the clubhouse?

  105. K-ace July 7th, 2008 at 12:51 pm

    Pete ignore these guys, they obviously waste their time flaming/ripping you since they have nothing else to do in Real Life.

    Anyways this was hilarious, Love the Blog, keep it rolling.

    ty//k-ace

  106. Jack Knight July 7th, 2008 at 12:53 pm

    who made the comment about his daughters being alright cause their father is a multi-millionaire? Money doesn’t raise children. What a dumb thing to say. Please don’t have children.

  107. S.A.- Just win games and can the offense stop being so offensive? July 7th, 2008 at 12:55 pm

    Time to whip out the LOTR trilogy again (which commentary track havn’t I listened to yet?).

    That reminds me..I really need to get the set of that Trilogy.
    I can’t wait for when The Hobbit comes out…in 2011…or whenever..

  108. Jack Knight July 7th, 2008 at 12:56 pm

    Also, Gardner zing was hilarious.

  109. yankeesmuse July 7th, 2008 at 12:56 pm

    Gardner is the second coming of Joey Gathright. LOL

  110. Jeremy July 7th, 2008 at 12:57 pm

    And here’s the obligatory lighten up comment from Pete.

    Pete, it’s as if you write posts like these knowing that it will annoy several of your readers so you get the chance to write a followup.

    There are no ARod apologists. There are simply Yankee fans who think his contributions on the field far outweigh any issues going on in his personal life, which have nothing to do with baseball. These people are usually tired of jokes made about ARod being vain, when there’s no evidence of him being more self-centered than most people, or unclutch, much less the day after he hit a critical home run against Boston.

    While I think your post is just dumb, your followup is actually offensive. The fact that you’re a reporter means that readers have the right to hold you to a higher standard than most bloggers. When you say that ARod is “chasing around after Madonna,” or is “practicing some sort of mystical religion” (as opposed to what? Some sort of non-mystical religion?) it implies you can back it up. Can you?

  111. AlexCT July 7th, 2008 at 12:58 pm

    i understand you were trying to be funny pete. and believe me, you were very funny. also i am certainly not an ARod apologist. i guess i just was surprised by it. my impression was that you had a pretty good working relationship with some of the players and that maybe they would frown on reading such a piece from you. there are human beings involved, even though alex may be doing everything he can to deserve the negative comments, his wife and kids are thrown in the middle and i am sorry for that.

    lastly, i think you should have mentioned that Cynthia could marry the stache and start a new trend of men wearing dirty facial hair to attract rich, newly single women. i know i’d do it.

    love the blog, keep it up.

  112. Brent (Never Should Have Traded Away Damaso Marte For Enrique Wilson!) July 7th, 2008 at 12:59 pm

    “No it isn’t. People are offended by Pete’s comments because there are children involved. The children have absolutely no idea about the garbage being printed about their parents. They’re really too young to have an idea. Now do you understand?”

    IMHO, whether they know or not isn’t really the matter at hand. If someone steals candy from a baby, is it justified just because the baby will get its’ attention diverted seconds later?

    Fit that example into this situation. I just don’t see poking fun at a failed marriage with two kids involved in the same light as other comedic pieces that Pete has done. Now do you understand?

  113. kidjock July 7th, 2008 at 1:01 pm

    Hilarious Pete! I loved it!

    People lighten up. It’s a joke! There is no game today. What are we supposed to talk about?

  114. Brent (Never Should Have Traded Away Damaso Marte For Enrique Wilson!) July 7th, 2008 at 1:01 pm

    “who made the comment about his daughters being alright cause their father is a multi-millionaire? Money doesn’t raise children. What a dumb thing to say. Please don’t have children.”

    +1!

  115. Zach in Port Jeff July 7th, 2008 at 1:02 pm

    i know the name of a good proctologist that specializes in removing the sticks from yankee fans behinds…

  116. j July 7th, 2008 at 1:03 pm

    this is not only a disgrace, it’s a nightmare.

  117. Zach in Port Jeff July 7th, 2008 at 1:04 pm

    i had mine removed after the 2001 season. such a relief.

  118. Peter Abraham July 7th, 2008 at 1:04 pm

    Jeremy:

    Lighten up. You’re putting waaaaay to much thought into this.

    To the guy posting as “Brian Cashman.” You’re not Brian Cashman, so pick some other name. That’s why your comments don’t post.

    That some people take that post seriously is a little scary. Just calm down. The tabs are calling him “brain-washed” and you’re giving me a hard time?

    Seriously, just relax. It’s no big deal.

  119. Zach in Port Jeff July 7th, 2008 at 1:10 pm

    I was actually hoping we could have a contest to see who could come up with the best headline for this whole charade…

    my personal favorite so far has been: “C-Rod Opts Out!”

  120. ellen July 7th, 2008 at 1:11 pm

    Holy cow – there are folks here who read Pete’s post and thought, “gosh, the poor kids?” Really? Did you think that when ARod was on the cover of all the tabloids with the blond stripper last year – or when the fans in other stadiums wore blond wigs, too? Were you upset for the kids when CRod wore that lovely kid-friendly tank top to the game – in front of thousands of fans (some other people’s kids)? There may not be enough proctologists for this job, Pete.

  121. Joe from Long Island July 7th, 2008 at 1:12 pm

    Pete – Keep up the good work. Now, I’ve got to get back to work.

  122. Brent (Never Should Have Traded Away Damaso Marte For Enrique Wilson!) July 7th, 2008 at 1:19 pm

    “Holy cow – there are folks here who read Pete’s post and thought, “gosh, the poor kids?” Really? Did you think that when ARod was on the cover of all the tabloids with the blond stripper last year – or when the fans in other stadiums wore blond wigs, too? Were you upset for the kids when CRod wore that lovely kid-friendly tank top to the game – in front of thousands of fans (some other people’s kids)? There may not be enough proctologists for this job, Pete.

    Yeah, I know what you’re saying. Nobody should call for Pete’s head if they didn’t have a response to the stripper. But you have to admit that a divorce puts much more strain on a family than a vulgar t-shirt or wig. I think the outcry would be similar if those events occurred now (in lieu of the divorce) instead of a year ago. Someone also mentioned that the media should be held to a higher standard than the general public. That’s why we see “A-Rod’s wife files for divorce” as a headline instead of “A-Rod’s a no-good, cheating, lying bastard!”.

    Believe me, I get your point, and it’s interesting. I’m just trying to add my $0.02 to find out why all evidence points to that being the case.

  123. Zach in Port Jeff July 7th, 2008 at 1:20 pm

    A-Rod will now subsequently have a 13-14 homerun month due to this frenzy.

  124. brianbashman July 7th, 2008 at 1:21 pm

    The use of his name was clearly my attempt at humor, I now see the light, and will never post a comment as the GM. Didn’t realize the use of selected names came under DHS guidelines and can serve as justification for editorial license to limit free speech.
    Yeah, this story surly now suffers the dead horse syndrome.

  125. They shoot horses don't they? July 7th, 2008 at 1:28 pm

    As a fan of SATIRE I found it fairly amusing.

    For all the Afraud fans that find it hurtful, they should remember that he is a public figure and as such there is no veil of privacy; implied or otherwise.

  126. Marc July 7th, 2008 at 1:30 pm

    I just hope A-Rod takes his frustrations out on the ball.

  127. Mike July 7th, 2008 at 1:38 pm

    ARod should punch you in the face for that one, Pete. I love the blog, but that is ridiculous.

  128. Hemmroidlloyd July 7th, 2008 at 1:50 pm

    So you can only go by what you see:
    1- A-Rod is now supposedly into that Kaballah religion.
    1A- So is Madonna, for now.
    2- there were 4 Hassidic guys front row 1st base side at Sunday’s Bosox game.
    3- Some Hassids go for Kaballah too.
    4- Some in the know think the Steinbrenners have had enough.
    5- Yankee Yamulkas, anyone??

    Hmmmmm.

  129. bigjf July 7th, 2008 at 1:51 pm

    Funny stuff, Pete! Who’d you steal this material from? ;)

  130. Old Lady July 7th, 2008 at 1:51 pm

    “Thanks to his own vainglorious nature, A-Rod actually gave his girls the middle name of “Alexander.””

    Pete – not sure if this was pointed out yet, but it’s Greek Orthodox tradition to give children the father’s first name as the middle name. How embarrassing for you.

  131. Old Lady July 7th, 2008 at 1:52 pm

    In case it wasn’t clear, A-Rod’s wife is Greek Orthodox.

    In any case, I’d pay to see Pete read this post to A-Rod following a game.

    Anyone else want to chip in?

  132. wood is good July 7th, 2008 at 1:54 pm

    I’d love, in an alternate world, to find out how many of the offended people here actually DO something in the real world to help children who suffer from having divorced parents. I bet a f-load less than the effort it takes to type out disgruntled posts. Look in the mirror, you phony, self-centered moralists!

  133. Hemmroidlloyd July 7th, 2008 at 2:05 pm

    Oh hell, who cares anyway..
    I don’t know what’s worse, that Pussy Youkelis and his constant whining or Paplebon’s barney badass look on the mound. Not so much scary as goofy looking.
    When the kid hit that grounder in the 10th off him, it made my weekend..second only to Manny going on standby at the plate, which was also worth paying the cable bill for..
    All in all, a nice Sunday.

  134. Callie July 7th, 2008 at 2:08 pm

    This is an inappropriate post. Exceedingly inappropriate.

  135. Brent (Never Should Have Traded Away Damaso Marte For Enrique Wilson!) July 7th, 2008 at 2:09 pm

    “I’d love, in an alternate world, to find out how many of the offended people here actually DO something in the real world to help children who suffer from having divorced parents. I bet a f-load less than the effort it takes to type out disgruntled posts. Look in the mirror, you phony, self-centered moralists!”

    Your post makes very little sense. People mentioned that it’s sad situation that children are put in when their parents split up, but they aren’t exactly dying from hunger or living in war-torn countries. What do you expect strangers to do to help? It’s sad, but not the end of the world.

    People have friends and family pass away. That, too, is a sad situation, but not to the point where anyone should expect a hand out. I don’t remember the last time I went to a grocery store and had them ask me to donate a dollar because someone died. In the same breath, I also don’t remember seeing a commercial featuring Sarah McLachlan hugging little kids while asking me to donate money just because “Mr. and Mrs. Jones” broke up. Get real.

    For you to criticize people for not lending a helping hand to those who don’t require outside contributions shows that you don’t know what you’re talking about.

    Btw, I thought the “phony, self-centered moralists!” part was hilarious. If we all threw around as many unrelated adjectives together as you, the Internet would shut down.

  136. Brent (Never Should Have Traded Away Damaso Marte For Enrique Wilson!) July 7th, 2008 at 2:12 pm

    Didn’t realize the use of selected names came under DHS guidelines and can serve as justification for editorial license to limit free speech.

    Free speech doesn’t apply to closed forums. Especially when there are written guidelines that clearly spell it out.

    That being said, I don’t think anybody really thought you were Brian Cashman, or that YOU thought you were Brian Cashman. :-)

  137. bronx jeers July 7th, 2008 at 2:14 pm

    Slow day huh. I won’t vote for Giambi. I prefer to do a write in petition stating that we wish to only vote for the an known as ” The Stache” !!

    Here’s a bunch of books by future ex-yankees.

    “Learning To Hit To Left Field- The 7 Year Plan”
    by Jason Giambi

    “Derek Jeter’s Guide to Television Commercials ”

    “Learning To Score – How to Seduce Ugly Muscular Women”
    By Alex Rodriguez

    “Walls- How to Avoid Them At All Costs”
    by Bobby Abreu

    “My Left Arm – How To Survive MLB With A Useless Appendage”
    by Johnny Damon

    “Living Together – Slumping Together: A Guide to Life ”
    by Robbie Cano & Melky Cabrera

    “Because I’m Awesome and I Rock !!- How I Signed A Big Fat Contract And Still Dominated In The First Year Of It Even While Nobody Else Ever Seems To Do The Same”
    By Mariano Rivera

    Just couldn’t do it to Mo.

  138. KLev July 7th, 2008 at 2:21 pm

    Thanks Bronx Jeers. Another good laugh. Could you add “The Invisible Man” by Carl Pavano? Or “Ticket to Ride – My Ride on the AAA Pine” by Kei Igawa?

  139. Clare July 7th, 2008 at 3:06 pm

    Jeremy,

    I agree completely. This is a pattern for Peter. He writes something “humorous” bashing ARod (or occasionally someone else), and then sounds like a 14-year-old bashing the readers who object (often with a “stick up the butt” reference – what’s that all about?).

    The cycle will be complete in a couple of days when he writes a post whining about ARod not talking to the media.

  140. Rob (the original) July 7th, 2008 at 3:09 pm

    Jeremy said”
    July 7th, 2008 at 12:57 pm

    There are no ARod apologists. There are simply Yankee fans who think his contributions on the field far outweigh any issues going on in his personal life, which have nothing to do with baseball.”

    Ahh Yes, would those be the same “loyal fans” that booed him during the 2006 season or called for his head when he opted out at the end of 2007? I love A-rod but the A-rod bandwagon has had more people jump on and off again than the 1996 – 2001 NY Yankees bandwagon.

  141. YankeesLuv July 7th, 2008 at 3:31 pm

    C-Rod isn’t getting half of anything, they have a prenup.

    TMZ
    “She’s seeking primary custody of the couple’s two girls, Ella and Natasha, as well as child support to “maintain the existing lifestyle of the children.” That includes life and health insurance and private school.

    Cynthia says her man, a “prominent athlete” with “substantial earning power,” has the “fiscal capacity to continue his high style of living” but she does not — hence she’s asking for alimony. She is asking to keep their $12 million, six-bedroom estate in Coral Gables, Fla. (and everything in it), as well as her sweet ride — a Maybach.

    She’s also asking A-Rod to pay off their debt, as well as her attorney’s fees.”

    She will and should get child support and anything else for the children’s sake but time for Cynthia to get a job of her own.
    But of course she won’t have to cause she will get a settlement of somekind, but it won’t be anything near half.

  142. Whitey Fraud July 7th, 2008 at 3:34 pm

    I think she ought to check out that urbane, literate, cosmopolitan man of letters, the one, the only… Peter Abraham.

    (He’s not playing for the other team, is he?)

  143. Whitey Fraud July 7th, 2008 at 3:39 pm

    Here’s the Miami Herald link, btw:
    http://www.miamiherald.com/459/story/595599.html

  144. Jeremy July 7th, 2008 at 5:00 pm

    “Ahh Yes, would those be the same “loyal fans” that booed him during the 2006 season or called for his head when he opted out at the end of 2007? I love A-rod but the A-rod bandwagon has had more people jump on and off again than the 1996 – 2001 NY Yankees bandwagon.”

    Not sure what you’re talking about. I was referring to fans who like it when players perform well on the field and find it tiresome when reporters or analysts harp about perceived flaws in players’ personalities as if they have some impact on, you know, baseball games.

    And what Yankee fan wasn’t frustrated and upset when ARod opted out? We were going from one of the best players in baseball to Wilson Betemit at third base. I can let a lot of anger slide there.

  145. ellen July 7th, 2008 at 5:12 pm

    “insensitive, fat man?” Wow.

  146. yanksince57-is this 1959 or is it 1965? July 7th, 2008 at 6:03 pm

    now we know why jeter’s been playing so poorly lately. he’s aware that a-rod will now be slicing into his maxim’s top 100 scoreboard :)

  147. RSM July 7th, 2008 at 6:24 pm

    Seems some of us are wound a little too tight. The post is funny. I printed it, and my entire office had a good laugh.

    Now I’m just trying to figure out why a 32 year multi-millionaire athelete, who can get just about any girl he wants, would throw his marriage away for an old and used hag like Madonna.

  148. Juggy July 7th, 2008 at 6:26 pm

    I don’t particular like tabloids and find most of the time the people who write tabloid material go by what other tabloids say as fact. Unfortunately, the original tabloid usually get their info from someone claiming to be a friend and collected 5 grand for false info.

    In the end, until I see it come from the source I wouldn’t believe what any writer says. Doesn’t matter if it’s true or not as long as they get the hits/sales.

  149. Shame Spencer July 7th, 2008 at 6:54 pm

    if this was jeter this entire post wouldnt even exist.. its a shame too cause i really like pete but i just cant get how sports ‘journalists’ can write about this stuff and still expect to be taken seriously. its an embarrassment to see this stuff on espn. leave it on page six where it belongs, i could care less who he’s banging.

  150. Christina July 7th, 2008 at 7:10 pm

    Some of you need to chill out. If you dont like what your reading, then dont read. Alas, if the people didnt care about Arods personal life, then they wouldnt print it. Problem is people DO care, and it sells papers. If you dont want your life thrown out there, then dont indulge yourself in the celebrity lifestyle where u are making millions of dollars.

  151. Shame Spencer July 7th, 2008 at 11:21 pm

    im not saying no media outlets should report it, all im saying is that it shouldnt be in the sport page of the new york times. keep it in people magazine, us weekly, star.. thats fine, but it doesnt need to be on espn that the guys wife filed for divorce. never in my life did i think sports center would be quoting madonna.

  152. CECI July 7th, 2008 at 11:24 pm

    Pete I normally get your humor,but this thread was beneath you.

  153. David July 8th, 2008 at 8:20 am

    I subscribe to Pete’s blog because I enjoy his writing. I choose to do this. Unfortunately there isn’t a filter in there that stops complete garbage like this from showing up in my feed reader. So what do I do? Unsubscribe to the whole thing or just chalk it up to an isolated example of poor judgment? I’ll go with the latter. Pete, maybe you can start a sports celebrity gossip column with Perez Hilton as an outlet for this material.

  154. stephsamps July 8th, 2008 at 9:51 am

    I am not sure why people are getting all over Pete here. I read the post and laughed through the entire thing (yes, even as a child of divorce). Pete is trying to make light/funny of a very difficult situation, and if you step back and try to not be so serious, you can laugh about it. I don’t worry the kids reading something that amounts to satire, I worry more about them reading the actual news coverage and finding out that their dad is (allegedly) an adulterer. While it has nothing to do with his performance on the field, it is a part of AROD and Pete has nothing to do with that.

  155. Jake July 8th, 2008 at 12:33 pm

    Don’t worry guys and girls, Cynthia will be ok whatever she decides!! She’ll have the last laugh. A-Rod won’t feel the payments to here, She’ll be living the vida loca

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