In previous springs, I’ve posted about the security at Steinbrenner Field. It’s harder to get in there than it would be to bust out of jail. I saw a woman put her feet up on the dugout roof today and I thought they were going to taser her.
Anyway, the head of the security army is this guy. He rides around on a Segway like Robert E. Lee on Traveler during the Battle of Gettysburg. He routinely — and I kid you not — zips around the warning track of the outfield when there is nobody on the field.
Some folks in the organization this year have dubbed him “Paul Blart: Mall Cop.”
Meanwhile, the son of Felix Lopez is a convicted steroids distributor. Lopez is George Steinbrenner’s son-in-law. That has not been a position with a lot of job security.